In this platform, as I thought there are many トビタテ students, who perhaps have the same feeling, so I’ve decided to share my thoughts here.
Of course, I’m welcoming those who are not!!
In Japanese culture, people tend to avoid something about private, i.e. family issues, if the person you’re talking to does not have a “deep” relationship to you. (Just a trend!) For me, it is a kind of a taboo to discuss it with them.
Other cultures, at least in the UK, according to my experience of residence there, it is very, or even common to talk about that issue. I don’t know, but maybe because people there think that it is quite common topic as a breakthrough tiger into a deep relationship. Or for them, it’s just like greeting.
But there must be someone who doesn’t prefer to doing so. Due to some difficult conditions, bad memories with their family, or even something they feel ashamed.
Because of these various kinds of personal reasons, it may be uncomfortable for some people to talk about, or to be discussed.
I’ve got an experience of some tragedies about health and family. I won’t mention all of them, but because of my background, there are several taboo issues for me.
This sounds very disgusting for many people to talk to me. (I know!) So I try not to express that I’m disgusted to talk about these topics even with someone having a deep relation with me.
Even I have tried so, there must be uncountable experiences that I showed my own feeling.
Of course, I usually don’t care about these things, and feel very happy and satisfied with my current life.
But in my depth of heart, I might feel inferior to those without any health difficulties, and with a ‘normal’ family background.
What I want to say here is that people without those experiences cannot understand those who with it. So it must be wrong to ask them to inderstand my uncomfortable feeling, or to stop asking about these issues.
But we have to care about our words, especially about something might be sensitive, family and health issues in Japan, for example, in the culture.
Therefore, it’s important to have a kind thought towards others. If someone seems not willing to talk about some issues, we have to stop talking about it.
With the kind thought and heart, I’m sure it’s possible! And more people accept and happy with their difficult conditions.
If they’re really the friends, it is to be done!